How and where should I begin? I am Persephone - demon spawn of Demeter and Zeus. I live half of my life in Hades and the other half in New York - which is like Hades only with subways. If I could be any literary character it would be Kurt Vonnegut's renegade porn star Montana Wildhack. If I could be any animal, it would be a tiger. If I could do any famous person, it would be A-Rod. If I could personally beat the crap out of anyone, it would be Paris Hilton. I'd beat her using Nicole Ritchie as a stick. If I could get anything I wanted for my birthday it would be a 1969 Corvette Stingray. If I could live anywhere other than where I am, it would be San Francisco - home of The Citadel - best public dungeon in the world. I love the Yankees, chocolate, warm nights in front of fireplaces, shih tzus and potato chips. Anything polyester turns me off. So do guys with open shirts, matching shoes and belts and guys who drink anything with an umbrella sticking out of it. When I was 12, I wanted to pose nude for Playboy. I still do. Everything else is none of your fricken business.