Nancy Drew: The Hidden Staircase

Ostensibly adapted from Carolyn Keene's 1930 Nancy Drew novel, Nancy Drew hits the scene to help the inexplicably wealthy Turnbull family get to the root of a dastardly set of circumstances: random household objects of no particular value are going "missing", throwing the ladies of the manor into conniptions. Nancy’s friend Helen enlists her help, and “hidden object” hunting ensues to dredge the plot inexorably forward.

Even given the credulous grandmother Helen’s belief that there well could be an interloper of ill-repute in their midst hellbent on intimidating the family, it’s all rather obviously a specious effort to spook the Turnbulls into abandoning their manor (and—spoiler!—sell to the conveniently present-in-Act-I neighbor, the corpulent Nathan Cromley). The cast includes a hopelessly green policeman, a sexagenarian mother in yellow overalls (like… just yellow overalls), and a few other pointless attaches and hangers-on that amount to less than window dressing. For a Simon and Shuster endorsed title, the “visual novel” elements are lacking and Nancy herself is largely unlikable throughout.

As to gameplay? It’s abominably conceived and executed, amounting to the worst hidden object game on the DS (tough company to best at that). Gorilla and THQ mishmash the thin plot into a frustrating, back-asswards, and blessedly short 3 and a half stages of negotiating some truly awful maps comprising the Turnbull Estate. You’re left hunting for a random lot of 30 of the advertised “Over 100!” unique objects that are not so much hidden throughout the house as haphazardly strewn about on and around surfaces in plain sight. Why is Nancy needed again? Make it through the first three levels to be rewarded with a short run of the puzzles ranging from brain-dead to annoying. It’s obvious the “no play through is the same” tack is there to make up for the game’s half-hour of content.

Compound the lack of fun and fulfillment in literally scratching items off of grandma’s housekeeper’s to-do list with a brutal *score* timer for each stage (What? …Why?!), and you’ll be left with no idea of who this game is for. The dialogue is wrote and drab even for children’s fiction, and negotiating the mansion with the stylus and D-pad—which is pretty much the mechanic underlying the entire game—never feels right. The engine capably allows the game to progress through its text boxes, but it’s all just dreadful.

This feels like go-to-your-room-without-supper material for its intended audience of tween girls, who’d be better off splitting their time with Princess Peach and, y’know, actual novels.

Spoiler alert 2: the titular hidden staircase is a drop ladder to an attic.